In my feelings, I know I'm right. In forgiveness, I know I am wrong.
Forgiveness is one of the hardest things to do in life. It's not easy to give forgiveness when we've been hurt, used, talked about, insulted, persecuted and so on.
I will honestly admit, I've struggled with unforgiveness, for a long time. Half the time I didn't know I had unforgiveness in my heart, until God confronted me.
I read a great book recently and it said, "We cannot defeat what we cannot define." When we're emotionally involved or attached, and someone wrongs us, we get lost in feelings and feelings are hard to get past.
Some of us are waiting for others to apologize, but sometimes that never happens. We can't wait for someone to know their wrong and give an apology. It's on us to do what God commands of us, and that's to forgive.
In Isaiah 43:19 NIV says, "Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past." That's what unforgiveness does. It dwells on the past. It can't let go. At times, it seeks vengeance. It reeks of bitterness, and it believes its feelings are right.
Speaking from experience, unforgiveness is a weight. A weight that will keep you from moving forward and always stuck. (Hebrews 12:1 NLT)
That word, "forget," is the word everyone who deals with unforgiveness has a problem with. They either don't want to forget or cannot forget.
I heard this pastor say, "The word forget makes it hard for many. Rather, understand it as 'don't cultivate on it.'"
Cultivating is allowing your mind to replay the movie of unforgiveness and keep you on an emotional rollercoaster.
In verse 19 of Isaiah 43 says, "See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?..." Notice how it says "see" and "perceive." How can we see a new thing when our eyes are fixated on the past? Our eyes collect pictures creating the movie of unforgiveness for our mind. And what we choose to continuously see, even if it isn't happening, we will not see a new thing.
There must be a renewing in our mind (Romans 12:2 NKJV) in order for our eyes to perceive and our minds to receive the new thing God wants to do.
I'm not saying it's easy, but it is a working process. It takes a lot of time spent with God in prayer, and His word, and effort in you participating in the change. God doesn't just remove it and make you feel better. He wants you to go through it and learn better.
Forgiveness is a choice. A daily choice. A moment-by-moment choice.
”Even if we feel guilty, God is greater than our feelings, and he knows everything. Dear friends, if we don’t feel guilty, we can come to God with bold confidence.“
1 John 3:20-21 NLT
Take it one day at a time, friend.
Scripture of the Weekend:
"Make allowance for each other's faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others."
-Colossians 3:13
Song of the Weekend:
Forgiveness by TobyMac ft. Lecrae
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